Let’s not sugarcoat it: being a mom is exhausting. You’re constantly on the go—feeding, cleaning, working, soothing, and repeating.
In all this chaos, it’s easy to lose yourself and you can forget what it feels like to do something for you. The days get blurry, and before you know it, you’re running on empty, wondering why you feel so drained.
I’ve been there! That’s why I strongly advocate that self-care isn’t a luxury or a guilty pleasure for moms. It’s a necessity. If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else—at least not in the way you want to.
But adding one more thing to your plate feels overwhelming, which is why I have put together my learnings to care for yourself. Today, I’ll share small, intentional steps that can refill your cup so you can master how to prioritize self-care as a mom and keep going without burning out.
Keep reading and see how to make time for self-care as a mom.
Things Moms Face that Put Their Self-Care on the Backburner
After having my first child, it wasn’t uncommon for me to not brush my hair for days. Having an actual shower also felt like too big of a chore because my mom brain would convince me to not leave the baby alone. Even though I had a supportive husband and on-and-off help around, life got too busy as a mom. Here are a few things that stopped me from caring for myself:
- Lack of time
- Feeling guilty for taking time for myself
- Not knowing where to start
- Not trusting anyone with the baby
- Not having a daily routine (even a rough one)
These things collectively kept me mayhem throughout the first year and a half of giving birth—THANK GOD it’s now better. If you’re a new mama, the above-listed things most likely won’t let you prioritize self-care, but we can work it out.
How to Prioritize Self-Care as a Mother: 6 Tips that Actually Work
Self-care for moms doesn’t always mean long bubble baths or getting the nails done—it can be as simple as getting 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep. A few years ago, I was so busy being a “mom” that I was exhausted and honestly, not the parent I wanted to be.
That’s when I realized something had to change and here are some things I did to prioritize self-care:
Start Small—Incorporate Micro Self-Care Moments
The idea of self-care is hard to manage for moms. But the good thing is, it doesn’t have to be a big production. It only means that you have to find tiny pockets of time to reset, even if it’s just five minutes.
For example, one mom I know uses her morning coffee as her quick self-care activity as a mom. She wakes up 10 minutes earlier than everyone else, makes coffee, and sits by the window in silence. With no distractions, it’s her and her thoughts. This small ritual feels grounding to her and she doesn’t start the day with an empty cup (quite literally).
Another idea for busy mom self-care is to use your nap time wisely. Instead of rushing to clean or catch up on work, take 10 minutes to do something for you. Like read a chapter of a book, stretch, or sit & breathe. These micro moments add up and work like little lifelines that keep you going.
Schedule Self-Care Like You Schedule Everything Else
If you don’t plan for self-care, it won’t happen. Period. Think about it: you schedule doctor’s appointments and work meetings. Why not treat self-care with the same importance?
Being a mom, you can block out 20 minutes every evening after your kids go to bed. You can use this time to do something you love, like journaling or watching your favorite show. Plus, treat this time as sacred—no interruptions allowed. Scheduling self-care shows that you treat yourself as a priority, and it will show in your energy and mood.
If you’re thinking, “I don’t have time,” remember this: you can’t pour from an empty cup. Prioritize self-care by treating it like any other non-negotiable task. Start small—schedule 10 minutes a day and build from there.
Ask for Help and Delegate
Here’s something moms don’t like listening to: you don’t have to do it all alone. Yes you know your child and home the best, but wearing all hats will only drain you. So ask for help. It’s a sign you respect yourself enough to catch a breather.
Lean on your support system when possible—be it your partner, a family member, or a friend. I lucked out in having an awesomes support system as a new mama and will forever be grateful for that. I hope you experience the same.
If it’s hard for you to seek help, but learn how to stop feeling guilty about self-care and start small—like asking your partner to take the kids for 30 minutes so you can take a walk or nap. The key is to communicate your needs clearly.
Say something like, “I need 30 minutes to myself this afternoon. Can you watch the kids while I am away, please?.” If you’re sharing the load with your partner, be more direct and tell them how the responsibility should be divided.
Redefine What Self-Care Means to You
Like I said, self-care for some is bubble baths and spa dates, but the truth is different for moms. The point is that self-care should be whatever fills your cup.
A friend of mine redefined self-care by focusing on her love for cooking. Instead of seeing meal prep as a chore, she turned it into her self-care routine for moms. She tells me how she plays her favorite music, pours herself a glass of wine, and enjoys the process. It’s her way of unwinding and doing something she loves.
Side note: Here is an easy meal-planning guide for busy moms you can also try.
So think about what truly makes you feel good. Is it reading a book? Going for a run? Painting? Create a list of self-care ideas that work for you; when you have a spare moment, you know exactly how to use it.
Set Boundaries
Learning to say “no” is one of the most powerful forms of self-care, not just for moms but everyone. If something takes away your energy— social obligation or an extra task at work—decline without feeling an iota of guilt. You’re raising a family, there’s enough on your plate already.
I used to struggle with overcommitting myself back in the day. I’d say yes to every event and friend’s meetup, which would impact my budget and leave me with no time for myself. All because I wanted to stay relevant.
But truth be told, I was the only mom in my friends’ circle and they couldn’t relate to my struggles, so I was suffering while trying to keep up. One day I realized I needed to set boundaries to protect my energy (and money, of course).
I now say no to anything that doesn’t align with my priorities. Slowly, my friends also understood and most of our group hangouts now happen when feasible for everyone.
Setting boundaries means you yes to yourself. You protect your time like you’d protect your child’s nap time. It translates into teaching your kids the importance of self-respect, and that’s also why self-care is important for moms.
Make It a Family Affair
You can better implement your mom’s self-care tips when the family is also on board. One option is a short family yoga session; kids often enjoy trying new poses, and you get a quick stretch without needing a babysitter.
If your children are older, you might plan a “family reading hour,” where each person picks a book, comic, or magazine and reads quietly in the same room. You all get mental downtime and it feels like a shared experience.
You can also try an art night where you each color, sketch, or paint. It can be surprisingly soothing for adults too. The main point is to pick something that lets you recharge instead of draining you further.
You Deserve Your Own Care
Being a mom doesn’t mean you don’t matter any longer. Your health and happiness are key to raising a healthy and happy family. So if you’ve been putting yourself last, understand that taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish. Give yourself permission to rest, recharge, and enjoy moments that make you feel like you again. You deserve it.
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FAQs
What if I feel guilty putting myself first?
Feeling guilty is common, but know that you can’t give what you don’t have. When you care for yourself, you become more patient and loving with your family. It’s okay to put your needs on the list.
How do I find time if I’m already so busy?
Start small, even a five-minute break can recharge you. Look for things that save time, like online grocery shopping or prepping meals in batches. Little changes can free up moments for self-care.
Do I need a support system to make self-care work?
Support helps, but it’s not the only way. If you’re on your own, try short self-care activities during naps or after bedtime. Local community centers or swapping babysitting duties with a friend can also give you a break.
